John Prine - Middle Man

I was sitting in a diner
With a girl named Flo
She wouldn't say yes
But she couldn't say no
She said "Darling, Can I get a middle man?"
She was engaged to a fellow
On the lay a way plan
But she carried all her money

In a coffee can
She said "Darling, Can I get a middle man?"
The cook looked over
With a short order face
Dropped a fork
And he saw Flo's legs Straightened his apron
And burnt my eggs
I got competition
Everywhere I go
These days

She was leaning on the juke box
And was lookin' real good
Like Natalie Wood
On a Pontiac hood
I said "Darling, I think I need a little hand"
Ya see, I've seen my downs
I've seen my ups
I seen miniature dogs